The dark red exotic imported sports car had been driving too fast when it skidded off the road; unfortunately, the passengers, two young women, were seriously injured.
JOCELYN:Almost, there's a missing comma and you forgot one of the adjectives;-) ROBERT:You have a couple of sentence fragments in there, and you need to think about adjective word order; also think about subject-verb agreement:-) LEIGHA:There are three things to think about--adjective word order, the subject of the verb, and punctuation;-)
The dark red, exotic ,imported, sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road and the passengers, two young women, were seriously injured
The exotic imported dark red sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road; unfortunately, the passengers, two young women, were seriously injured.
The exotic, imported, dark red sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road; unfortunately, the passengers, two young women, were seriously injured.
The exotic, imported, dark red sport car was being driven too fast when it skidded off the road and injured the passenger and two young women seriously.
JOCELYN: You have changed the adjective word order and that doesn't help;-) LEIGHA: I'm glad you remembered those commas:-) VIVIEN: Almost--check for a word form error;-)
The exotic, imported dark red sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road, and the passengers were seriously injured and two young women, too.
13 comments:
The dark red sports car (an exotic import), travelling at an excessive speed, skidded off the road resulting in serious injury to two young women.
LAURIE: That's an excellent solution:-)
The exotic, dark red sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road and the passengers, two young women,were seriously injured.
Robert Smale said.
The exotic, imported, dark red, sports car. Had been driving to fast, when it'd skid off the road. Two young women passenger, were serious injured.
The dark red exotic imported sports car had been driving too fast when it skidded off the road; unfortunately, the passengers, two young women, were seriously injured.
JOCELYN:Almost, there's a missing comma and you forgot one of the adjectives;-)
ROBERT:You have a couple of sentence fragments in there, and you need to think about adjective word order; also think about subject-verb agreement:-)
LEIGHA:There are three things to think about--adjective word order, the subject of the verb, and punctuation;-)
The dark red, exotic ,imported, sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road and the passengers, two young women, were seriously injured
The exotic imported dark red sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road; unfortunately, the passengers, two young women, were seriously injured.
The exotic, imported, dark red sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road; unfortunately, the passengers, two young women, were seriously injured.
The exotic, imported, dark red sport car was being driven too fast when it skidded off the road and injured the passenger and two young women seriously.
JOCELYN: You have changed the adjective word order and that doesn't help;-)
LEIGHA: I'm glad you remembered those commas:-)
VIVIEN: Almost--check for a word form error;-)
The exotic, imported dark red sports car had been driven too fast when it skidded off the road, and the passengers were seriously injured and two young women, too.
YOUNG LAN: Note that you have changed the meaning--the passengers are the 2 young women;-)
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